Life-FINAL

Making the right decision

~ Sarah ~ Leave a comment

pharrell williams fast company

I’m not the most decisive of people.

While reading Fast Company‘s “Secrets of the Most Productive People” though, I started to notice a pattern. Many profiles included answers such as, “I eat the same thing every day,” or “I don’t have a million clothing items to choose from.” These people argue everyone only has a finite amount of decision processing power each day, so they limit choices in other areas of their lives to save it for the ones that truly matter for supporting their family, coworkers and business.

So maybe it’s not that I’m indecisive…maybe it’s just because I’m making so many important decisions every day (ha) that I get too overwhelmed to place my drink order within a waiter’s first through third visits. (But seriously, how am I supposed to choose between beer, wine or cocktails I know I love or risking it all on a new one I might not like as much?? Sigh.)

Pharrell Williams said visionaries like Vogue’s Anna Wintour “understand instinctively how to protect creativity within a business. ‘They are 100% decisive. Snap, no. Snap, yes.'”

I would like someone to describe me as 100% decisive. I used to think I just needed to get better at choosing an option right off the bat and letting the chips fall where they may….but that is only half the equation. What makes these people “visionary” isn’t that they make decisions quickly, but that they make the right decisions quickly.

How do we (I) get better at successful snap decision-making? I don’t have all the answers, but here are some ideas:

1. Fully know yourself / brand / goals to better recognize what fits or not

2. Have a plan to minimize distractions

3. Surround yourself with people who are smart, skilled and trustworthy

4. Learn from decisions that didn’t work out as anticipated

This article made me realize the importance of #2 and evaluate how I can plan or streamline to improve my own day to day. I function much more efficiently during the week when I know what I’m going to eat, for example, rather than looking up at noon with a grumbling stomach, needing food now, researching the unimpressive surrounding options, then settling on a Whole Foods field trip yet again.

It’s also time for another closet purging. Really, it’s crazy how many clothes (read: dresses; my roommate’s parents refer to me as “the girl who never wears pants”) I own, despite bags and bags of giveaways in the last year and a half. Plato’s Closet is my ally in the never-ending effort to own less stuff, and since my closet seems to regenerate like Halloween’s Michael Myers or those birthday candles that just don’t blow out, it looks like I’ll be making another trip soon.

I have a feeling my bank account is also going to appreciate this added foresight.

Best day of my life

~ Sarah ~ Leave a comment

“Your wedding is SO you.“

“…the wedding of your dreams.”

“Your special day.”

style me pretty blog

There’s a lot of pressure in wedding planning to create an event that magically embodies my taste and personality in a way that not only provides every attendant with a seamless, joyous experience but also surpasses every other day of my own as the “best day of my life.”

I’ve had the good fortune to be surrounded by parents and a community whose examples have taught me that “successful” marriage is about commitment over time, actions not always feelings and continuously breaking your own selfishness to better love the other person. But while everyone seems to be down with this whole “marriage is not for you” thing, weddings are a whole different story.

I’m also fast learning that there are far more concerns to take into account than traditional wedding talk lets on…feelings, family, finances, and oh yeah, the fiance himself. Which means this whole “my wedding,” “your special day” stuff from wedding magazines, vendors and pretty much everyone else isn’t exactly true. It’s all enough to make a girl feel frustrated and frankly, a little lied to. In Wedding Planning Conversation #1 alone, it was all I could do to keep from pathetically (and now hilariously) wailing, “But it’s myyyyy wedding!”

When I shared my conflicted emotions with a married friend, she just smiled knowingly and listened patiently. She then told me she ended up happy with her wedding not despite but because there were things included she hadn’t originally pictured or gone 100% as planned. When she looked around she saw bits of her and her husband in the compromises.

Despite my surprisingly strong need desire to have a make-your-own-cupcake takeaway table, I think this is true. Because how does it make any sense that a commitment to care for someone else starts with a day all about only me?

Pains of the perfect present

~ Lydia ~ 1 Comment

I find buying presents to be incredibly stressful. My expectation for when I give a gift is to make the receiver the happiest possible. I always want to find that gift that they have always wanted, didn’t know they wanted, something surprising or at least makes their day.

Easier said than done.

You see, when you try to find the perfect present just a few days or hours before you need to have it, your resources and ideas are limited. So this year I decided to do my Christmas shopping earlier. I started making a list of ideas about a month ago and have been secretly listening intently when talking to the family and the boyfriend to what they casually say they really want. With the exception of one difficult to buy family member, all my holiday shopping is done. Sounds great, right? Wrong.

Now I have these great gifts that I want to give NOW. The appropriate window for giving Christmas gifts is like a month away. Pure. Torture. I might need to get some really cute wrapping paper and ribbon to tide me over through Thanksgiving. Holidays are rough, people.

Lead like women

~ Lydia ~ 1 Comment

Lead like a woman, not like a man – Della Williams

I’d like to apologize in advance. Because if you’re a woman, you’re likely sick of articles telling you how to live your life… annnd that’s mayyybe what I’m about to do.

A few weeks ago the beau and I attended the 50th Anniversary of Williams Pyro (now, WilliamsRDM). WilliamsRDM was started by Della Williams and her now deceased husband, and Della continues to reign today. Since the beginning of the business, she’s been in the trenches working in every department to ensure success. She’s loved and respected by all her employees, peers and anyone who has the opportunity to work beside her – this was apparent by the many that came out that night to present her with a gift to honor her character, accomplishments and leadership. She’s strong, independent, caring and warm.

One thing she said that night really stuck with me, the quote at the top of the post, women need to lead like women.

I’d never really thought about this before, as silly as it may sound. But men and women are different. Typically, we don’t interact with our friends and our coworkers the same. Women are scientifically and genetically more in touch with other’s emotions, for example. Men and women are different. And to me, it seems we’ve figured this out when it comes to dating (men are from mars, women are from venus), but haven’t quite figured it out when it comes to the workforce, or how to deal with it. Women, as a movement, are still figuring out the best ways to utilize our own personalities, traits and qualities to lead in the workforce. And really, this goes for everyone. Both men and women as individuals must learn how to use their personalities and skill sets to lead. However, men have been working in business longer than women, so women have a little catching up to do. We need to hone those leadership skills that we do have, not try to attain those that men have. And no matter what, your’e going to encounter people who disagree and those that agree. Personalities clash, no matter what your gender is. It’s just going to happen.

It’s further evidence that it is so important to have women like Della Williams paving the way for future women leaders. To have someone not telling, but showing you what it means to lead like a woman, not like a man.

Della Williams is a powerful woman. Not because of her status in her company, but because when she speaks at the podium, people listen. She has strong integrity, a big heart, passion and the work ethic to boot. She is a strong woman leader, who leads like a woman.

To be a female leader, you can’t act like a man. Simply because you aren’t one.

Currently Craving: Camel Peacoat

~ Lydia ~ Leave a comment

I don’t have a winter coat but it’s not from a lack of trying, rather from a lack of decisiveness. I haven’t been able to bring myself to purchase a good coat because I fear hating it a year later (I do that. Like, all the time). My problem is that I have an equal appreciation for Free People and Urban Outfitters as I do for J. Crew and my fashion choices depends on the day and where I’m going. If we want to relate this to Pretty Little Liars (when do we not?), I go between Aria’s and Spencer’s style. I like gladiator style boots just like I crave a pair of Manolos. Oh, woe is me.

But, I think I’ve come to a decision. I, Lydia, want a camel colored peacoat..with a little edginess to it. They’re just so gorgeous. It’s classy and classic. Naturally, the only ones that catch my eye are in the $500+ range, so the hunt continues. Wish me luck.

0a142f226a194bb4255be2393fd876944ceb432c3a473c2108c63757cc5d8535193775b8bc0b89ecc4218d7ca87964e366f1b6173336e1af350454a5aaa24c75

Side effects of engagement

~ Sarah ~ 3 Comments
Appreciating the city from Central Park...
Appreciating the city from Central Park…
Fantastic espresso followed by Central Park...a brisk (ha) 65 degree day in November!
Fantastic espresso followed by Central Park…a brisk (ha) 65 degree day in November!
First broadway show for the boyfriend, first together.
First broadway show for the boyfriend, first together.
The view from our friends' apartment...no kidding.
The view from our friends’ apartment…no kidding.
I'm saying it...Best bakery in NYC!
I’m saying it…Best bakery in NYC!
Apparently this is the 'temporary' ring and I get a new one next week...do I also get flown to New York again next week? Just asking.
Apparently this is the ‘temporary’ ring and I get a new one next week…do I also get flown to New York again next week? Just asking.
Post-engagement tapas with sweet friends.
Post-engagement tapas with sweet friends.
Homecoming surprise with dear friends, my madre, prosecco and Sprinkles gluten free cupcakes of course!
Homecoming surprise with dear friends, my madre, prosecco and Sprinkles gluten free cupcakes of course!
Banksy? Or just a look-alike? Either way, it is true.
Banksy? Or just a look-alike? Either way, it is true.

Last week I found myself in an unexpected but all-consuming state of crazy. Somewhere between fearing discussing marriage with the boyfriend, rolling my eyes at yet another engagement announcement on Facebook and scoffing at friends’ complaints about how frustrating the post-talk, pre-engagement phase is, I had the overwhelming realization: I need a wedding Pinterest board. Like now.

Within a few hours I was right beside those friends, pinning all the things and moaning, “Why doesn’t he just do it already so I don’t have to be stuck waiting around? I don’t even know if it will really happen! Not to mention waiting for my fate to be instigated by a man is decidedly insulting for my feminist sensibilities…but there’s still no chance I’m the one proposing.”

Crazy.

Little did I know I wouldn’t have to wait more than a few days, as I was whisked off to New York City for the weekend with loverly friends, front mezzanine Broadway musical seats, a leisurely Central Park stroll, gluten/dairy/soy-free baked deliciousness from Babycakes and finally, a candlelit rooftop proposal overlooking the New Yorker and Empire State buildings. (Yeah, he might be a keeper.)

It turns out, though, getting engaged only exponentially increases the amount of uncertainty. Not only are there actual wedding plans to make (blagh), but we’re going to have to broach everything from worrying about people’s feelings to wondering where we’re going to live to actually figuring out this whole getting my own medical insurance thing.

And then there’s the questions. So many questions. I realize it’s only been a week so everyone’s just really excited for us (and truthfully, rant aside, I am too), but it worries me. I’m still the exact same person. Same goals, dreams, struggles and passions. For some reason, when a girl gets engaged, everyone seems to forget about this. Suddenly, wedding planning is all anyone thinks to ask about. I’ve seen it happen (and been guilty of perpetuating this myself), and it just makes me want to yell, I’m a whole person!

This is one reason I’m super grateful for my awesome friends, in addition to a whole lot of support and surprise celebrations, they just…talk. I had dinner with one such friend this week. After spending an hour and a half sharing work stories and life updates, we finally got around to talking about The Engagement. But you know what she was more interested in than the proposal story? Talking about how she’s seen us grow in our relationship over the past two years of our friendship and how neat it has been to see us appreciate each other the more we understand each other. Love her.

All that said, it has been quite fun typing this whole thing with a shiny diamond on my finger. 😉

The world is a fashion show

~ Sarah ~ 1 Comment

I like to think we talk about some ‘real life’ things around here…finding our place professionally or in relationships, efforts to be our best self with healthiness/fitness/habits, etc. So I can’t help but feel a little superficial when all I really want to do is another ‘trend’ post and tell ya’ll how excited I am about something in the fashion world.

But if this blog is about being real, then I have to tell you – I’m real excited about mixing neutrals.

Black on brown leather, grey jeans with brown boots, suede with just about anything…I’m all over it right now. Earlier this week I wore three shades of brown with a black top. I even instagrammed my latest combination, singing to myself a little diddy that consisted of “boots-and-tights, boots-and-tights” repeated in sing-song fashion.

Yup. (I’m highly creative at penning lyrics if you hadn’t noticed.)

And you know what? I don’t really care if it’s silly. I get dressed for me every day, and even if I don’t see another human being, I get a kick out of wearing things I like. If it takes the same amount of effort to pull clothing over my head, that clothing might as well be a cute dress, right?

I may have calmed down a bit since my melodramatic teenage years yelling “All the WORLD is a fashion show” a la Shakespeare in response to my mother’s complaint about waiting far too long for me to just accompany her to the grocery store already (“It’s just Kroger!”).

I no longer watch tv and “have to” grab a notebook “right this second” because there’s a crazy cute outfit on screen inspiring ideas that need sketching. Seriously, guys, I had so many pages of futuristic outfits (I preferred the terms “mod” and “fashion-forward”), I could have been a costumer designer for the next Zenon movie, but I digress.

I DO still glean quite a lot of inspiration from the fashion world though. Here’s some photos of what I’m loving lately, courtesy of Pinterest:

black hat brown scarf

black and brown leather jacket

black brown and grey tights and boots

tights and shorts

P.S. I also spent much of 6th grade wearing one, only one, huge dangly earring with a Chinese symbol on it because I was convinced the asymmetry was cool… #whenfashionlovedoesntloveback

A writer’s insecurities

~ Sarah ~ 4 Comments

levo league

This morning as I was absentmindedly scrolling though Facebook and sipping on my new favorite tea in an effort to pull myself out of the Monday morning haze, I was greeted with a new article from Levo League. Despite acknowledging the now bordering on cliche title about how someone figured out their twenties, I couldn’t help but think “Twenty-something? That’s me, an article about me, I wonder if this applies to me! Figuring out, I’m figuring things out, maybe this will help me figure things out!” in between more cynical judgments of my own sucker-ism that “These words are an over-used ploy for clicks and ‘figured out’ seems a little presumptuous don’t you think”…I clicked anyways and told cynical Sarah to go back to sleep. Or so I thought.

Because after clicking I found misplaced commas. Misspelled words. Misused tenses. Missing apostrophes completely changing meaning from possessive to plural. More misplaced commas.

It is hardly the standard of quality I’ve come to expect from Levo League, and even though I think the content was pretty good, the fact that it came with one glaring grammar fault after another completely distracted me from that value and shattered all assumed credibility. So I kept judging. I judged her age. I judged her alma mater.

I continued clicking through to her blog, reading a recent post that included a well-written anecdote about her public humiliation from a misspelling due to lifetime struggles with dyslexia…

Oh.

Whoops. I don’t think I’m the only one so quick to judge others, and I’m certainly not free of my own misplaced commas or worse, misspellings (ha…too soon?). It made me think about why I had such a strong reaction of snowballed judging. She seems like a perfectly nice, driven girl with whom, upon further blog investigation, I have an awful lot of shared interests.

And then this thought happened. “Is it because she’s published? Because you’ve wanted to submit writings for almost 2 years and haven’t tried even once? Because…you’re…jealous?”

Well there’s an uncomfortable thought.

So it’s time. I’ve been gathering online publications that accept submissions for so long, it’s time to actually send something to some of them. I’m not sure what this something will be or when, but I’m putting this goal out there so I have to do it. So there it is. On the screen. Being real.

For the record, my morning wake-up efforts didn’t work. I’m practically sleep-walking in heels, which is not an easy feat for someone just a little lacking in coordination. My high school choir teacher always said, as someone tripped up a riser or a fell off the top one for the umpteenth time, “Someday you’ll be graceful.” …Someday is not today, folks.

Time for something new

~ Sarah ~ Leave a comment

tips for time management

Unless you count the obsessive speed with which I can power through two seasons of Sherlock in one weekend (in addition to a full social calendar, a movie and six episode of House of Cards), I can’t really boast “efficient” and “productive” as two words consistently high on the list for how I spend my personal time.

For instance, continuing my Italian education has been a goal of mine since college. My old textbook and verb tense flash cards taunt me from my bedroom bookshelf, but somehow seem to require far too much effort to actually pick up when the time to do so presents itself. The next How I Met Your Mother episode on the other hand? My Netflix’s placeholder at the end of Season 6 speaks for itself.

But with a glass of Turkish wine in hand and the glowing Bosphorous Bridge in the distance, I turned to my roommate during our trip and told her I knew what my next Big Goal is…making time for getting back to really learning Italian. Now, I’m fully aware the likelihood of me knowing Italian in Texas isn’t exactly going to break down language barriers anytime soon. For me, it’s more about the personal achievement and the satisfaction of *finally* following through. And if planning another trip to Italy becomes the ultimate reward for my efforts…well I think I can live with that.

Most people have way more free time than they think they do (according to Fast Company) and I’m guilty, too. These three words (also from Fast Company – are you picking up on my other obsession?) have gone a long way in inspiring me to re-evaluate how I spend my time and how I can make more of it or just feel like I do: Protect, Delegate, Automate.

  • Protect your time. My parents always told me as I rushed out the door breakfast, make-up bag and shoes in hand that I don’t give myself enough time for anything I do, resulting in over-scheduling and chronic late arrivals. After experiencing a pathological amount of “really bad traffic,” I had to admit that maybe there’s a tiny bit of validity to their observation. While all this running about is great for calorie burning, saying no every now and then and allocating more time for everything can go a long way in building in both more free time and more energy to make the most of that time. Another Fast Company article held advice from a CEO who never schedules meetings or plans to do any work on Fridays, therefore building in plenty of availability for when things pop up or get shifted. Interessante.
  • Delegate. I place a lot of responsibility on myself in the form of personal tasks, work and guilt, which don’t always need to be mine to take. Asking myself, “Do I really need to be doing that or can someone else excel at it, handle it or learn from it?” has gone a long way in helping my work team to succeed, my stress to subside, my trust in others to grow and finally, my to do list to shrink along with the time spent thinking about it.
  • Automate. What do you do often that can be streamlined to free up actual time and/or mental time? For me, this means setting up automatic bill payments, text reminders about non-automatic payments, email rules, calendar reminders on my phone for everything from taking out the trash to replying to an email…I think you get the idea.

Now all that’s left is to finally do it! I think I’m going to commit to one Italian session a week through the end of the year…that’s only 10, which is totally do-able. Google searching “learn Italian for free” has led to a few helpful resources, and of course, I always have those trusty flash cards waiting patiently.

Morning start

~ Lydia ~ 2 Comments

Morning routines are super important to how you feel for the rest of your day. They say you should eat like a king in the morning a prince at noon and a peasant at dinner. Or, queen and princess in my case ;). What you eat in the morning affects your mood, your energy and what food choices you make throughout the rest of your day. I’m a big fan of morning routines (plus they get me to work on time!).

So part of entering into a super healthier lifestyle, this week I tried substituting morning coffee for warm lemon water. “They” say it offers a ton of benefits when you drink it first thing, before you do absolutely anything else. My favorite ones were that it kicks off your digestive system, cleanses your system / is a diuretic, clears skin, energizes you and enhances your mood. I’m all about the energy, cleansing and clear skin so I was totes down to give this whirl.

Morning-Drink-Hot-Water-Lemon

I can’t lie.. it was kinda rough.

Perhaps my biggest mistake was giving up on coffee the same week. I hadn’t gotten a lot of sleep the weekend before and felt like I had never fully made up for it until I was able to sleep in on this lazy Saturday morning. I don’t drink a ton of coffee, usually just one small cup in the morning. I just love it in the mornings, sometimes just the smell is all I need!

Regardless, I was tired all week. In my job, I’m sitting at a computer writing content and researching all day so if I’m tired, my eye lids start getting heavy. Looking at my screen gets harder and before I know it I’m starting to drift asleep.

Plus it turns out that half of a lemon in just a mug of hot water tastes pretty terrible. At first it isn’t so bad. The warm water is soothing and delicious in the AM, but then when it cools down…it’s just a little too much.

Although I did feel kinda tired all week, I did notice feeling more energized after having the warm lemon water. Furthermore, my skin was breaking out over the last few weeks, and I already see improvements.

I’m definitely going to keep up the lemon water in the morning.